All posts tagged: energy

I Wish You Had Been It

I had hoped you would be everything I wanted, but you weren’t. That’s OK. I overlaid my expectations on you to see if they would match up perfectly with who you are. Some things did, but most didn’t. That was on me. Still, I stayed. Still, I told myself I should be flexible; I should adapt; I should learn a new way of loving. And I did. You inadvertently taught me that. Thank you. You pushed me to my limit and then asked me to keep going, and I did. I broke some of my own barriers, and while I certainly didn’t do it smoothly all the time, nor did I always get it right, I certainly gave it my all. I certainly tried. Eventually, I grew tired. Sometimes I need a break from being outside of my comfort zone for too long. I need to pause, and process, and take things in, and understand, and heal, and grow, and move on. Often, I can continue on my journey with the same person, but that’s …

The Art Of Self-Sabotage And How To Stop It

A quick guide to self-sabotage: Let in every, and any, negative thought about yourself. Pay no mind to whether said thoughts are real or simply perceptions. Believe these thoughts. Watch your reality turn sour. Easy, huh? We do it all the time. We allow, and sometimes even encourage, our minds to drown in debilitating thoughts. This happens mainly due to a lack of awareness and a sense of impotence, of believing we are not in control of our lives and our realities. Yet nothing could be farther from the truth. Our individual realities, our personal worlds, are created daily by us with every thought, word, and action. It is a continuous and often impercetible process; we are so used to thinking that we seldom stop to consider what we think about. Gradually, we end up influencing every aspect of our lives, but our lack of awareness leads us to not understand how things came to be or why certain situations delivered certain outcomes. This is when we start blaming external factors–things, people, or the entire …

A Reckless Abandonment of Self

There’s a song lyric by my favorite Argentine band, Soda Stereo, that I love above all others: “El silencio no es tiempo perdido” – “Silence is not time wasted.” There are many times when words are not necessary, neither written nor spoken. It’s a hard lesson to learn for those of us who love words and who also love letting our tongues run loose. For me, the greater lesson I constantly struggle to grasp is to not fall prey to extremes. I don’t like it when things are black or white; there are too many shades of gray in between. However, if I happen to be in the process of teaching myself to keep my mouth shut, to listen to another instead of interrupting them with my unsolicited ideas and opinions, I will most likely end up defaulting to the other side of the spectrum: I won’t speak up when it is correct and healthy for me to do so. Anger is an emotion that I used to never keep inside, but I have started …

Go Do

How would you define “love”? When I look up the definition on Dictionary.com, I’m given the following options: noun 1. a profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person 2. a feeling of warm personal attachment or deep affection, as for a parent, child, or friend. 3. sexual passion or desire. 4. a person toward whom love is felt; a beloved person; sweetheart. I understand that coming up with just one, solid answer for a concept so complex is not realistic; however, am I the only one that’s not satisfied with these options? Allow me to share an excerpt from a beautiful blog post that was shared with me (I will think of it as “paying it forward”): “Love isn’t an emotion or even a noun. It’s a verb. Better defined as giving. As putting someone else’s needs above your own.” Love is a verb. Love is something that you do to another human being, not just something that you feel. That is probably the simplest, yet most powerful phrase I’ve read in an extremely long time. Of course, …